THEOPHANES is by far the most habitable of the satellites of the gas giant Mytilene.  It has a breathable atmosphere, large freshwater lakes, and adequate agricultural potential.  Because it is enveloped by the ring system  and numerous other moonlets of Mytilene, it is frequently subjected to dangerous meteor strikes.  Theophanes' ruling oligarchy lives in a well-shielded fortress that protects them from harm, but the rest of the population is not so fortunate.  To encourage their continued economic support, each year one worker is selected to bring their entire extended family inside the fortress and become a new part of the permanent elite.  Each unit of taxes paid corresponds with one entry into the lottery which determines the lucky winner.  Friends who remain outside may receive an occasional gift basket, but on the whole they report that their former acquaintances swiftly lose interest in associating with them or even writing letters.  Nevertheless, support for the government remains high, as does hope for living in the Fort next year.

PALANCA has widely-scattered settlements occupying the arable regions of the planet, which are separated by mildly toxic wasteland.  Each settlement supports exactly one church, that of the Homeless Carpenter.  Said profession is solemnly revered by Palancans, who strive to outdo one another in feeding and clothing any stranger who offers to perform that sort of work.  Anyone whose previous employment has failed need only learn the bare rudiments of woodworking before making the arduous journey to a neighboring village, where they will of course be a stranger.

MARMOL is widely known as the "planet of corrupt rich fools".  One certainly needs to be rich to live there, as expensive protective equipment is needed to survive the frequent electrical discharges between Marmol and its natural satellites.  Being corrupt is not a requirement, but there are plenty of other places for rich people to live without being corrupt; indeed there are others where being corrupt is not a significant problem.  But if one isn't already foolish before emigrating to Marmol, it doesn't take long before that appelation becomes appropriate.  The addictive spice called "älluis" comes from a native plant's pollen, and even casual exposure usually leads to increased consumption.  The most damaging effect of älluis dependency is a progressive decrease in intelligence.  Inhabitants don't need to take stupid risks to get more älluis, since it is easily acquired, but eventually they always do.  One too many unshielded walks to get another sniff results in an almost complete reduction to ash.  Little research has been done to determine why Marmol has any inhabitants at all, since the rest of the galaxy is just as happy to be rid of them.

WINDY is a planet in the Terris sector with the surprisingly uncommon trait of being named after one of its physical features.  A vast and permanent cyclone circles this world, with sustained winds sufficient to sweep an unprotected person off their feet.  Protection against this danger is provided by sturdily-constructed contiguous buildings which form an interconnected megalopolis.  Transport ships are occasionally able to land at one or the other side of this city as dictated by the position of the storm, and an internal tram system conducts people and goods with admirable efficiency.  Windies can and often do spend their entire lives without leaving the great city of their home.  There is just one complication caused by their culture, and that is the practice of wind dueling.  If any person feels that they have been insulted or mistreated by another, they may insist that both parties "step outside".  This may involve a lengthy journey to actually reach an external door nearest to the hurricane, and perhaps an apology or payment will settle the matter before exiting becomes necessary.  If it does, however, the duelists are not permitted to attack or even touch each other.  They may only jockey for position while attempting to remain standing, and perhaps shout their demands over the raging winds.  Fatalities are rare, but visitors are strongly cautioned to remain polite and not tempt the locals to engage in this custom.  It is certainly not a fun and safe activity as sometimes advertised by disreputable touts.

MARCOLI is one of the most paradisical planets known to exist, at least from a climatological perspective.  Warm seas and gentle breezes predominate.  Each of the planet's numerous lush islands is home to a population which is fanatically devoted to one of the many native plant species.  No Marcoline can eat any other food or wear clothing woven from any other material.  How they decided to specialize in such a strict fashion is a mystery, but apparently it works well enough, because all of the inhabitants remain healthy and adequately clothed.  One might expect each island to cultivate only its chosen fruit or vegetable, but that is unfortunately not the case.  Windblown spores germinate everywhere in the rich soil of Marcoli, and the plants seem quite intent on growing entangled with one another.  So growing their crops is not difficult for the Marcolines, but harvesting them is rather labor-intensive.
Worldwide friendly trade ensures that each agricultural product eventually reaches the island where it is most appreciated.  Visitors are advised to carefully research the islands they intend to visit, and attire themselves appropriately using exported goods available throughout the Sunderland sector.  Imported food and clothing is strictly prohibited.

OSORIO is inhabited by capitalists who are exceptionally committed to rapid turnover.  A single day is considered to be the maximum lifespan of any retail business venture.  Every morning, new signage appears on every storefront, advertising an entirely new line of products and services.  Of course, competition is intense to stake out a claim on the most popular business sectors.  One has to get up pretty early to be the day's most popular sign manufacturer, for example.  But if inspiration, dedication, and other corporate imperatives fail, there is always substantial demand for garbage collection and recycling.

CADDO is an icy moon of Bole which is occupied by a militaristic sect of that planet's Hakuraku society.  They emigrated to avoid the necessity of living almost entirely in protective darkness, but they are sworn to protect their brethren and the brightly-glowing orb that dominates their night sky.  Fortunately there have been no overt threats to Bole, although whether this is due to their protection or otherwise has not been demonstrated.  Their most remarkable achievement is the development of a chemical matrix called "yaoshu" which allegedly imparts knowledge directly into a person's brain after it has been absorbed through the skin during a ritual "Spirit Dance".  The yaoshu chemicals are said to be carefully "programmed" with whatever skills and memories are needed for a person's role in the society.  One constant among all those patterns is a keen and constant desire to remain on Caddo and serve the Hakuraku faithfully.  At least this is the observed behavior of all whose curiosity has compelled them to take an oath before taking a yaoshu treatment.  Perhaps they are being compelled by threat of force rather than a force of will, but no one has ever abandoned Caddo.

ZIERIA is the galaxy's only commercially viable source of zieron, a toxic gas with multiple industrial and military applications.  Because Zieria is collectively owned, all of its citizens share equally in the profits from the zieron wells, which are decades old at a minimum.  Enthusiasm for drilling new wells has diminished, but the old ones are still productive enough to sustain the planet's small population.  Currently the most severe punishment for crime on Zieria is well maintenance duty, which involves confinement to a hut full of machinery.  Once there, a prisoner has a fairly strong incentive to do a good job preventing zieron leaks.  If for some reason the prisoner's efforts are insufficient, though, there's nothing more that can be done except to send in another conscript who was unfortunate enough to be convicted of a crime.  Justice works swiftly on Zieria, but its effectiveness leaves considerable room for improvement.  There is a lot of poisonous zieron floating around.

Everything went according to plan for this, the last character class on my list of ascensions.  In fact, it directly followed my Rogue ascension from back in April.  Why did it take so long?  Perhaps the title gave that away.  This tourist came, and saw. and killed absolutely everything.  After acquiring the quest artifact ("Don't Leave Home Without It") and a bag of tricks, he realized that he could camp out at the altar on dungeon level 6 and sacrifice monsters to his heart's content.  Okay, maybe strictly longer than anyone would be content to sacrifice monsters.  To be clear, I do not recommend this play style unless you wish to get over your nethack addiction for a while.

Create monster stopped working on DL6 at about turn 293,400.  He descended into Gehennom to create tougher monsters.  Demons and such stopped appearing on DL27 at about turn 313,900.  Back upstairs to check some more non-Gehennom levels.  On Oracle level DL8, baby dragons, naga hatchlings, baby worms, baby crocodiles, and angels (putti?) were exhausted around turn 335,200.  In the castle on DL25 there were archons, ki-rin, and titans, which are themselves able to cast "summon nasties".  This can someties be annoying, particularly when they summon each other along with their nasty friends.  But create monster stopped working for them too around turn 342,000.  That was the last of the randomly-generated monsters!

I made a decent effort to clean up all the remaining monsters so the dungeon is as safe as possible.  It actually is quite eerie to walk around without seeing a wandering monster every once in a while.  I did leave the shopkeepers and temple priests alive since they're always peaceful no matter what the player's alignment.  I also left behind some of the less-valuable artifact weapons and gems on DL1, along with 64,655 zorkmids, because I didn't want my encumbrance level to be more than Burdened.  That probably wasn't a real danger, but oh well.

30136 creatures vanquished.
59 species genocided.
222 species extinct.

Aloha Ferret the Demigod...

You went to your reward with 46439376 points,
Magicbane (worth 3500 zorkmids and 8750 points)
Sting (worth 800 zorkmids and 2000 points)
Mjollnir (worth 4000 zorkmids and 10000 points)
Vorpal Blade (worth 4000 zorkmids and 10000 points)
The Bell of Opening (worth 5000 zorkmids and 12500 points)
Fire Brand (worth 3000 zorkmids and 7500 points)
The Book of the Dead (worth 10000 zorkmids and 25000 points)
The Candelabrum of Invocation (worth 5000 zorkmids and 12500 points)
The Platinum Yendorian Express Card (worth 7000 zorkmids and 17500 points)
     205 aquamarine stones (worth 307500 zorkmids),
     164 fluorite stones (worth 65600 zorkmids),
     149 amber stones (worth 149000 zorkmids),
     145 garnet stones (worth 101500 zorkmids),
     126 chrysoberyl stones (worth 88200 zorkmids),
     117 turquoise stones (worth 234000 zorkmids),
     112 opals (worth 89600 zorkmids),
     110 amethyst stones (worth 66000 zorkmids),
     101 citrine stones (worth 151500 zorkmids),
      98 jet stones (worth 83300 zorkmids),
      96 jade stones (worth 28800 zorkmids),
      94 topaz stones (worth 84600 zorkmids),
      93 rubies (worth 325500 zorkmids),
      75 black opals (worth 187500 zorkmids),
      71 emeralds (worth 177500 zorkmids),
      61 diamonds (worth 244000 zorkmids),
      56 jasper stones (worth 28000 zorkmids),
      55 dilithium crystals (worth 247500 zorkmids),
      47 jacinth stones (worth 152750 zorkmids),
      29 sapphires (worth 87000 zorkmids),
      29 agate stones (worth 5800 zorkmids),
      27 obsidian stones (worth 5400 zorkmids),
       5 amulets of life saving (worth 750 zorkmids),
       1 amulet of change (worth 150 zorkmids),
and 3170 pieces of gold, after 364070 moves.
You were level 30 with a maximum of 7140 hit points when you ascended.

https://s3.amazonaws.com/altorg/dumplog/Ferret/1680964958.nh367.txt

From the game "Canvas", available on boardgamearena.com