Bear with me here; this takes a bit before I get to the point. So I'm a nominally heterosexual caucasian white male. I have a tiny little amount of street cred when it comes to prejudice and discrimination, but nowhere near enough to justify me going on about it (anti-Appalachian prejudice does exist, but I can pass, kind of thing.) That said, it's bloody well time for everybody to go on about it, because Trump and his fellows have enabled a huge amount of complete assholery and oh-my-god-are-you-really-saying-that that has actual, real world consequences for huge numbers of people across the planet. 

I want to do something. I donate to causes (it's hard to donate to political campaigns in the US from Canada), I vote, all that kind of stuff, but I was at a loss as to what. 

When I sat down and thought about the situation, I had an idea of something I can do. It's not a lot, and it won't actually affect the people who are most complicit in this disaster, but it might nudge the center of the bell curve 0.000001% in the right direction. The thing is, I'm worried about it. 

Here's the idea:

As a piece of art, I'm designing and building a game. Six players, concentric track-based - imagine Trivial Pursuit if it had three circles instead of just one- drawing cards to affect gameplay, etc.  Players draw cards -I'm stealing from Ticket to Ride here - that tell them what they have to do on that game board. So far, so good. 

The key bit is - I am building discrimination into the game rules. Certain players will have a definite, highly unspoken, advantage; they get more choices, they get a starting bonus, they can do things to the other players that  the other players can't do back, and so on. I won't state it in the rulebook that "Player X represents WASPs, and player Y represents Mexican-Americans" - it's just that there are more cards in the deck that let the blue player do things to the yellow player than vice versa. 

I'm thinking about including cards that let the players choose to vote on altering the rules - five out of six players can vote and say that the yellow player can't enter the inner circle, say, or that three out of six can demand the other three give them all their cards. 

It will be entirely possible to play the game so that everybody has the same shot at victory - just don't use the cards that screw other players over.

The goal is to get six male, white, cis players to sit down and play it - and maybe film the thing, maybe not, depending on human experimentation permission. Hopefully, as the game goes on, one or more of the players will realize that they are being systematically dicked over by both the rules and the other players. "Hey," they should say, "This ain't fair. I can't win", at which point I leap in and go "That's the point!"

There are games-as-art out there; there's one called Train that uses the act of playing a game to induce a feeling of complicity in an atrocity (I won't say how, that's part of Train's point). This one, though, isn't about complicity, it's about systematic discrimination.

The thing is: I am nervous. 

I don't want to be a dick. I don't want to be the white guy co-opting the oppression of others. I don't want to be Kevin Costner doing Dances with Wolves and thinking he's doing the First Nations a favor. 

I am, being white, cis, male, etc., complicit in the system that discriminates. I can't speak to the nonwhite, noncis, nonmale experience. What (I think) I can do is address how systems are put in place by people somewhat like me that result in systematic discrimination.

Is this fair?

Can I do this without being a dick?


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9/24 '18 4 Comments
I think you can, as long as your explanation of the final product (the film) explains that you wanted to make something clear to people who may have the same experience that you do.
Rob, if you feel like you have worked out the HOW...don't just make the game, write up a pitch for a reality TV show and send it around. Like Candid Camera, but not. Gather your white male players with ads asking for "focus group participants" and only reveal the primary mechanic if the group doesn't figure it out under gameplay conditions.

Probably can only do one season, and you'd have to film every episode before anything aired or else the secret would be out.

Or...let the secret get out. But the game would need to be balanced so you would get the result you want even with people coming in trying to exploit the system because they know the planned outcome.

Or... let them exploit it, which would also prove your larger point? All these players are going to sign a release, they will have zero ability to influence how they are protrayed in the final product. A narrator can hollow out the victory with cutting commentary for example.

I'm not helping at all with the how :/ But I think you could aim bigger on the what. There's an audience for this material.
"Is this fair? Can I do this without being a dick?" I don't know. I don't even know HOW to know -- but I know I want to see what happens. I really do.
Have you ever heard of the educator, John Hunter? He wrote a book called World Peace and Other 4th Grade Achievements. (And now there's a movie, a website, and access to the game he developed in the classroom.)

It's a different tack, doesn't deal in the same explicit way as you're talking about with white male privilege. But it's in the same philosophical space and you might find it really interesting. Link here:

http://worldpeacegame.org/

Link to the movie trailer (also on the website):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=393&v=lCq8V2EhYs0
 

It's 7:47 am. I have put a load of laundry in the washer and cleaned up after the dog. 

Why Is The Sudden Resurgence Of The Song 'Africa,' by Toto, A Thing? 

The song 'Africa,' by the pop-rock band Toto, has recently surged in popularity on the Internet. It has become a popular tune for musicans of all types to cover, and YouTube videos of the covers are shared frequently. However, some argue very effectively that the colonialist nature of its lyrics and ham-fisted attempts at echoing indigenious African music are insulting to Africans and their descendants. In this essay, I will argue that the recent embrace of the song  'Africa' shows us more about ourselves, via resitance to toxic masculinity, white fragility, and cultural imperialism, and embrace of new communication methods. 

This essay assumes that the reader has basic familiarity with The Internet, the concept of memes, and the song "Africa" by Toto. We also assume that the reader is familiar with the popular music video which supported initial single and album sales. A full analysis of the video will be available at another time, upon request. 

"Africa" reached number one on the Billboard Hot 100 chart on February 5, 1983. Though Toto has other top 5 hits, it remains as their most memorable song. The band was more attached to another hit song, "Rosanna," and in an interview with KROQ-FM, dismissed Africa as "an experiment" and "dumb," and said that it has used "placeholder" lyrics that stuck (such as Phil Collins' use of "Sususudio," or Trey Parker's use of "Shpadoinkle"). The lyrics used as placeholders aren't nonsense words, and they end up illustrating ideas that show a colonialist bent. On its surface, the song seems to be about a white man, who goes to Africa, expecting to find knowledge, spiritual fulfillment and romantic love. The explosive chorus of the song (listed in 2012 by NME magazinein 32nd place on its lost of "50 Most Explosive Choruses") implies not that he found any of these things, but that he "bless(es) the rains down in Africa." The implication that the narrator has the godlike power to bless a force of nature places him in a selfishly powerful position. The rain, in the cathartic chorus, is a release from the tension that the rest of the song sets up.  

Embracing this song, with its colonialist attitude, implies that the next big meme probably should be Old Kentucky Home, with its original lyrics. The song doesn't seem to be shared by people of color. Though it's been recently covered by Weezer (their recording peaked at #3 on the US Adult Top 40), no R&B artist has covered it, no rap artist has sampled it. despite the fact that it would be very easy for someone like Kanye West to do so, it simply hasn't happened. The rap community samples, re-mixes and shares their work, at a higher rate of viral speed than other groups (citation needed), but a popular African American re-interpretation of it hasn't surfaced in the way other versions have. The covers of this song which have gained popularity have been voiced by men. Versions have been made popular by Family Guy, American Dad, South Park, and Jimmy Fallon. There hasn't been a version which grabbed the zeitgeist that is sung by a woman, or a non-binary and/or outwardly LGBT person.  Essentially, it's a straight-white-male-hit. Is this song a secret white supremacist dog whistle? An anthem for the Brock Turners, Richard Spencers, and other rabid tiki-torch carriers? Though that interpretation, sadly, is valid, we need to examine this phenomenon more closely. 

To start simply, let's look at the sharing of this meme. The website Know Your Meme details the inception and process of it being shared via YouTube. As of this writing, their charts show that its popularity as a meme is rising. 

In 2010, working musician Mike Massé shared a video of his low-fi interpretation of the song. The performance was solely on guitar and bass, with no drums. It's a soulful, catchy, intimate video. Their choice to strip the song down and avoid drums left the possibilities of alternative musicianship in performing the song wide open. In 2013, the Angel City Chorale used the summer-camp game of making hand sounds to simulate the sound of a stirring and visceral rain storm in their YouTube performance. Angel City's mission is to promote tolerance and diversity in Los Angeles,  so the colonialist nature of the song was brushed aside in favor of the musicianship of the explosive chorus. The popularity of the song allowed the choir to showcase its strengths, and garner over eleven million views. 

In both cases, what we have here is the use of a popular, simple, song to allow musicians to show their strengths, via re-interpretation. A subreddit was created, challenging musicians to submit their alternative versions of the song.  It's entirely possible that the subreddit may have been created by whatever record company owns the rights to the song. Unlike the Rickroll meme, in which the song "Never Gonna Give You Up" varied minimally, if at all, this meme required variations on a theme. The result was that musicians learned, re-interpreted, recorded, and published their versions of the song, and those publications were shared. People who share memes for the sake of sharing them shared it, along with people who actually care about the musician or the song. It has been popular among more than one generation. Essentially, the song is shared because it's shared. It's popular because it's popular. 

What about the song itself? Does the "sharing to share" of this song mean that there's more racism going around than people would like to admit? Fine. Let's unpack these lyrics. You could go to Geniuslyrics dot com and look up other interpretations, but you're here, and you got this far. So, get yourself a fresh beverage and strap in, folks. Here's my interpretation of "Africa." For the purposes of brevity in this already too-long essay, and because of the song's resonance with young white men, we will refer to the narrator as a "he," though the gender of the narrator is never mentioned in the lyrics. 

I hear the drums echoing tonight

We start with an unreliable narrator. His initial description of the world is drumbeats and darkness. We know that this is an oversimplified, cartoonish version of Africa, the continent. It is possible that the drums could be echoing from a neighbor's stereo system, or blood rushing in his ears from his own heartbeat, or any number of sources. However, at its essence, what we have here is drumbeats, darkness, and mystery. 

But she hears only whispers of some quiet conversation
She's coming in, 12:30 flight

The narrator is distanced from a "she." She is separated from him, by gender, flight, by the bubble of an airplane and the safety of quiet conversation. 

The moonlit wings reflect the stars that guide me towards salvation

He years for some kind of spiritual fulfillment, reflected in her safe space in the flight, the quiet conversation. I interpret this symbol as the space that feminists and other progressives claim, to debate topics and make progress. It's distant from the narrator, and he knows it. By contrast, he has drumbeats and darkness. But, he wants to join that space. 

I stopped an old man along the way
Hoping to find some long forgotten words or ancient melodies

The Magical Negro is a symbol that has infiltrated Western fiction for centuries. The lyrics don't say that this man is African, but we assume he is. In any case, the narrator assumes not only sagacity in the old man, but also that the old man is willing to dispense knowledge, like a vending machine. 

He turned to me as if to say, "Hurry boy, it's waiting there for you"

The man doesn't say anything. He only turns to him and gives him a look, to get going. The sage doesn't provide a proverb for him. Or does he? is the adminition to shut up, stop overthinking, and get going, a message in itself? The listener is left to wonder. 

It's gonna take a lot to take me away from you
There's nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do

We get the first version of this chorus. It is unclear if the "you" mentioned here is the aforementioned "she," or the nation of the song's title. Whatever this "you" is, it has become integral to the narrator's quest for knowledge and spirutual satisfaction. 

I bless the rains down in Africa

How does the narrator have power to "bless" rain? He doesn't. He's not a god, his distance from spiritual fulfillment indicates so. Could "bless" be interpreted as a word for the expression of gratitude? If the lyric had been, "I thank the rains down in Africa," it wouldn't have scanned as well. In the 21st century, we experience heat and hurricanes like never before: rain can be a welcome gift, as well as a killer. To say "I thank the rains" oversimplifies the power that rain can have. To use the verb, "bless," rather than "thank," implies the deep spiritual relief that rain can provide, or the epic nature of the power of rain.  

Gonna take some time to do the things we never had

The narrator knows that he needs patience and persistence to acheive his goals, but the lyric falls short of resolution. Like what has been called a "feminine ending" in Shakespeare's iambic pentameter, this lack of resolution shows the narrator's unreliability, and powelessness to finish his quest. 

The wild dogs cry out in the night
As they grow restless, longing for some solitary company

Again, we have another cartoon-metaphor of Savage Africa: wild dogs, to go with the aforementioned drumbeats. However, feral dogs can exist anywhere, coyotes can be heard in Los Angeles. So far the only concrete evidence of the narrator's world is that it has drumbeats, darkness, and wild dogs howling. he described them as restless and lonely, not dangerous or hungry. The dogs are a metaphor for his own loneliness and restlessness. 

I know that I must do what's right
As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti

Kilimanjaro is nowhere near the Serengeti. Both are located in Tanzania, but they are 100 miles apart. This makes it clear that the narrator has only the thinnest understanding of what Africa is really like, and probably has never been there. He mentions Olympus. Whether he means the mythic, fictional Olympus, or the actual Olympus, in Greece, is unclear, and unimportant. He is taking an African geographic icon and understanding it by applying  his own knowledge of icons important to the Western mind. In this sentence, he shows his own cultural weakness. This leads up to the most important line in this song (highlighted by the harmonizing backing vocals):

I seek to cure what's deep inside, frightened of this thing that I've become

The narrator acknowledges his own weakness, confusion, and unreliability, and wants it to be cured. After this line, the song's chorus repeats, with little change. This concept is as far as the narrator's understanding progresses. he knows that he doesn't like what he is, and wants to change it. He doesn't have a plan, or a totem to grab, just a bad state of mind that he wants to escape. 

The "Africa" in the song is not the literal continent. It is a state of mind, where the narrator is ignorant of other cultures and mindsets, but hungers for understanding. He is in the dark, and can only populate that darkness with a few concepts he has been told about. His conflict remains unresolved. Let's go back to the fact that the narrator's gender is never mentioned: he's not even trying to hang onto a concept of manhood. In the traditional version of this song, the coda is a stripped-down, nearly emotionless version of the drumbeats from the opening of the song, implying that the narrator remains in this dark, lonely state. 

Songwriter David Paich said (in an interview with The Guardian) that the lyrics came out of his childhood desire to see the world. He was fascinated with stories the priests at his Catholic boys' school told about missionary work. The minimal understanding of Africa in the song comes from his childhood's thin understanding of Africa as a continent. He also said that the biggest conflict the priests faced was the loneliness and celibacy. And, of course, sex sells pop records.  The band has stated that they are uncomfortable with the overt meaning of this song's lyrics. As guitarist Steve Luthaker said to Paich, "Are you Jesus, man?" Though Paich didn't intend to write a song about toxic masculinity in conflict with nature and "other"-ness, the conflict is there.

It is entirely possible that young white men embrace this tune out of a desire for validation of colonialistic urges. However, as we see in this lyric breakdown, it could be the story of a guy who wants to break away from a closed-minded, dark, lonely state. The resurgence in popularity of this song can indicate a male desire for multiple interpretations, for participation in culture, and a need to be part of something greater than themselves. Whether or not the people who share this meme are aware of this or not, like the conflict in the song, is still a mystery. 

THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK, AS THE KIDS SAY. I am available for pop-culture-analysis writing gigs upon request. 

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9/24 '18 18 Comments
When I was a kid and the song came along, I knew very little about Africa. I knew the song was talking about going places you don't know and finding something powerful. Being a fantasy nerd this appealed to me.

As an adult, my understanding of the subjects involved is better. I get the problematic elements more, especially in the music video. That said, the original theme of journeying to find yourself still appeals and it is also just damn catchy to listen to. It has an earworm quality to it. I suspect nostalgia also plays a roll. Perfect storm of things to make it appealing to me.
I'm right there with you on the nostalgia thing. You might enjoy this: https://www.theguardian.com/culture/2018/jan/30/toto-how-we-made-africa
I have of course had the song stuck in my head all day.
GONNA TAKE A LOT TO DRAG ME AWAAAAAY FROM YOOOOU!!!!!
Now you're just doing it on purpose.
THERE'SNUFFINDENAHUNNIDMINAHMOORE COULDEBBADOOO!
When it comes up (inevitably) in this circle of friends that I mentioned in your previous post, it seems like the most fun part is everybody singing the chorus. It's loud, even people like me who don't know the lyrics to anything can fake their way through it, and it has a few harmonies for a dozen or so voices to fool around with. So it's fun!

Maybe people are enjoying the terrible lyrics ironically?
I'd be inclined to agree. "I bless the rains down in Africa" is right up there with "and there won't be snow in Africa this Christmastime."
WTH was wrong with us in the early 1980s?!
Blame Reagan. He was such a black hole, even people who disagreed with him were spun off into wrong directions.
There is a cycle of cluelessness - catchiness - uncoolness - ironic enjoyment - cluelessness - catchiness. Mostly harmless, until you get "ironic racism" and people who can't tell if Kanye is trolling us or not. (Alas, he's not.)
But when he does figure out trolling, it's going to be NUTS.
The recent surge is, I think, because of some teenager trolling the band Weezer on Twitter, begging them to cover the song. When the request grew legs with followers, Weezer capitulated.

Why Africa in general, though? Your scholarly Ted-talk analysis is as good as any.

My personal memories around this song are... weird. When the song was released, I was in my first year of college. For late winter/early spring break, my boyfriend and I rented a Chrysler K Car and drove down to Florida*, where we stayed with a relative of my mom's.

I never understood the lyrics to Africa; they made ZERO sense to me. Zero. (And from my position of privilege, I never needed to think about them until fairly recently.) But wow that song sounded good on what were, in my limited experience, a bass-heavy souped-up stereo system in the rental car. Because it had soared to the top of the Billboard charts at the time, we had numerous opportunities to hear it on the radio during the drive to FL and back, cranking the volume every time. The sound of the song made my spine tingle. The timber of the voices, the synths, the percussion.

I am, btw, the very opposite of a music head. I'm married to a music head, many of my best friends are music heads... I am not a music head. Where they are moved to tears by a piece of music, I'm thinking, "Oh that's kind of nice; I like that." So for me to remember this song and have such a strong response to it is fairly unusual. I'm sad that the lyrics are as dumb and divisive as they are.

*Remember when you could easily do that? Drive down the coast on 95 and not have it be a parking lot?
Yeah, I realize now that I misunderstood the lyrics for a long time. I thought it was, “I miss the rains,” and I thought it was “sure as Kilimanjaro rises like a nimbus above the Serengeti.”

And yes, that tune is powerful with the right sound system.
I love this song. I always thought the line was, "like a leopress" -er, a female leopard- rather than Olympus though. Also, I think that the song was written in the selfish, self-absorbed 80's, and it's a meme because things that the popular opinion believes are terrible- like this song (after it's chart-topping days, it's often trotted out as "omg this song is bad")- become memes in the long run. It's so very earnest and out there, and that makes it rife for mockery and high-concept, trollish lolz.
True. I like "leopress" better than "nimbus."
Selfish, self-absorbed 80s is right. Also, Raiders of the Lost Ark came out in 1981, so there was that whole "white guy goes to exotic locales, wears lots of cotton, takes what he wants" aesthetic. See: Duran Duran's videos for Hungry Like The Wolf, Save A Prayer.
wow. nice close reading. I eagerly await the day when Toto's Dune soundtrack gets its day in the sun.
Thank you! I feel good now.
 

I just had a rather fantastic encounter at my local coffee shop (Peet’s). I had settled in to do some catch up work on art stuff. I had just finished a commission for my buddy Krishna. His wife asked his daughter the age old ‘If you could have a super power, what would it be?’ thing. When they heard the result (a modification of Elsa, of course) K commissioned me to draw it up. The result is above.

Anyway - so I’d just finished up the image, and a family came in with a little boy who can’t be older than 8. I noticed the printer paper in front of him with... are those comic panels? And pencil drawings? Why yes. Yes, they are.

”Are you drawing a comic?” I asked.

He was a bit shy with the big hairy stranger, but with a glance at his mom (grandma?) sitting next to him, he said “Yeah.”

”Well that’s awesome! This is what I just finished!” at which point I turned the iPad to face him and clicked the play button on the time lapse video for the image.

His jaw dropped and his mom started Oooh-ing.

We proceeded to have a conversation about art and comics and I introduced them to software he could get for his iPad and of the very concept of ashcan comic books. He’d said that he was doing them and keeping them to himself. I explained that (if he wanted to) ash cans would let him keep the originals and still share copies with his friends.

The whole family seemed delighted.

For a while now, I have been in seventh heaven listening to the sounds of the little boy quietly narrating his comics to himself as he works. Both dialogue and (far better) sound effects keep coming while he’s drawing.

He’s not playing on an iPhone. He doesn’t have his own laptop here. He’s not watching Youtube. He’s drawing. With pencil and pen on paper.

That. Was. Me. When I was a kid, and it’s just so very good to see as an adult.

* * * * *

In case anyone’s curious, this is the text for the commission:

"Here is what M told me she said: "If she could pick any magic power she would pick being the princess of ice and snow mountains and being in control of fire. And she hopes one eye was clear and white and one eye was red and orange"."

And here’s a link to the time lapse video of the process - https://photos.app.goo.gl/YQEXkK1kQEe4DHw47

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9/23 '18 6 Comments
Gaaah! I can't read what M told you she said. It's in different text that doesn't wrap in mobile. I'm in potrait mode now, so it cuts off at

"she said: "I

When I flip my phone to landscape I get a few more characters, but they display off my display. :-)

Wondering if I should submit a bug report, or should I just reload the page requesting the Desktop Version™?
Anyway, this interaction with the boy made me SO HAPPY. Go fuzzy guy, go!
Thanks for the heads up. It's because I used the 'preformatted' option to try to differentiate - like quote formatting in a book. I've changed it so you should be able to read it now.

I've also added a bug report for the OPW folks. :)
Oh! Thanks! I was gonna do that-- thanks for taking care of it!

And thanks for re copying/pasting the quote so'z I can read it now. Yay!
OK, I'm in DesktopMode now, and it shows a teeny bit more of the quote, but it still won't wrap... and it still runs off my window no matter my phone orientation.

(I'm using Chrome.)

Bummer!
Oh, and Maj. Dickason's Blend from Peet's is the coffee of the house here. They make a half-caf version that we buy from Peet's online, and it's pretty awesome seeing the "Roasted on" date be the week prior to me grinding the beans in the kitchen. Damn tasty.

I have Patty to thank for turning us onto that blend. Peets rocks!
 

So, this is after. What a difference a day makes. Next up, heat pump.

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9/23 '18 9 Comments
Nice fence!

Also, heat pumps rool. We have a ground source heat pump that heats and cools our whole house, just an open loop of water in and out of a well through a heat exchanger.
Yeah, if I were planning on staying and the budget would allow it I would love to upgrade to a ground loop. Mine is an air exchange, which means when it's really cold out it switches to electric heat. But the next owners are free to upgrade!
Lots of people around here have installed air-to-air exchangers and love them! In my climate zone you can *kind* of go either way, but in the coldest part of the year the air-to-air systems usually require backup. The advantage is that air-to-air systems come prebuilt and are easier to install; ground source ones are built on site so you’d better have a good engineer who knows what they’re doing. And of course installation costs are different, so you have to weigh not only what you can afford but also how expensive what you’re replacing cost to heat/cool your home. So if you live in a part of the country where heating costs are relatively cheap, an expensive ground source system wouldn’t make as much sense.
Why yes I COULD nerd out endlessly about heat pumps, why do you ask??!
The real upgrade is a ground loop heat pump with humidity control. That system is worth it's weight in, well, not gold, but maybe aluminum? It's for those chilly, humid days you get in the midlantic and northeast. AC circuit runs to dehumidify and the electric heat circuit runs to keep the house at a survivable temperature.
Nice work. When I worked for a fence company (who will remain nameless, but is not likely the one you used) the boss was bat shit crazy. BUT - he _really_ got us to do good work. If we didn't, he would tear it out and have us go back and fix it later. So while I elected to not continue working with them, I learned a lot about what good fence installation looks like. :)
I had a wood stockade fence and it is a stark difference on how much more privacy a solid panel gives you.

Sorry about the crazy boss. I know how memorable they can be!
Yeah. True, he was nuts (I still remember the day I decided to leave - he was screaming that he would piss in all of our tool boxes) but like I said - I learned a lot, so I _did_ get something out of the deal.
Ooooh-- that's a purty fence.
 

I was just reviewing my OPW posts and saw I'd put up a floorplan of the previous apartment, but I haven't posted our condo's floor plan. So here it is.


A bit sloppy as the original was flipped but I've updated it with the moved closet in the master BR (it used to be a wart in the smaller bedroom, rude). The kitchen bar/passthrough is wider and has no uppers now, and there's a laundry machine in the adjacent storage room.

It's an interesting building and I think it's very smartly designed. There are two 20 storey circular towers, each floor with nine suites. (There is no "13" floor, and the top floor that would be 21 is labeled "PH" though the suites there are identical to those below.) That angle between the two walls is indeed 40 degrees and it's kind of a pain dealing with it. On the other hand, it makes for much less wasted space in the common elevator area. All of our doors open very near each other in the centre of the tower, a small hallway that runs around the elevators / stairwell / mechanical ducts in the centre of the building. Most of the units are nearly identical in layout and size, though there's +/- 10% square footage to accommodate structural elements. There's a low building between the towers that has six floors of units with rectangular layouts. On the ground floor and three floors below that are parking, lockers, and extensive amenities (gym, sauna, pool, library, movie room, hobby/woodworking room, etc). And there's a nice garden too.

All told there are nearly 400 units. I figure this, combined with the smart design, is how our condo fees are so low given what we're getting for them. One might think the $250K per month the condo corp receives in fees is a lot, but it's not cheap to run and maintain a big building, and do it well. Plus pay city taxes.

We like it here, and the only annoying thing right now is the shortage of personal storage lockers (e.g. rental closets) that are presently oversubscribed, so we still have a few boxes / bins of art materials and tools that should ideally be stored away out of sight but there's nowhere to put them but in our living space.

Also it's easy walking distance to p much everything.

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9/22 '18 8 Comments
Wow! What a nice layout! But you didn't diagram in where the pickle buckets are...
Heh. Right now they're in a spill-proof container on a small furniture dolly in the laundry area. I should post an update ... tomorrow.
There are surprisingly more right-angles in this floorplan than I would have expected on first glance.

This looks and sounds like a wonderful place to live. Congrats again on the move and finding a place you both love and can feel comfy and welcome, and where you can get what you want closeby.
Yeah, they really did a good job with minimizing wierd corners. That said it was still a pain in the ass doing the baseboards.
We also pay city taxes. Not the sum someone with their own yard to maintain would, but enough to cover services.
This V-shaped floor-plan clearly demonstrates that Sean, and not Richard Herd, was actually the leader of the Visitors.
I have a cookbook for sale, too.
 

It's 1:39am on September 22 East Coast time. Forgive my unmade face, undone hair, and overexcited NJ accent... but I just invented what's basically a 3-D salty/sweet cronchy version of Fun Dip. This is what inventors look like.

I am not proud of this. I am SO proud of this. It is gross and delicious and I am also not proud. But proud. But not proud. Yep.

I was originally gonna lock with post so only my OPW people could see this, which is why I didn't care that I recorded this video au naturale, sans makeup et sans le coiff, et plus de drooooop. But I also don't give a shit. This is whatcha look like at 47 and eating marshmallow fluff snax. 

Enjoy. 

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9/22 '18 44 Comments
Srsly, popcorn on the stove or GFTO. It's what's for lunch on Saturdays.

Though if you use corn oil instead of canola (we use canola because CANADA, FUCK YEAH), then isn't that like seething popcorn in its mother's milk?
I also giggled over "CANADA, FUCK YEAH."
Microwave popcorn is an abomination.

I use peanut oil because it's what was on the shelf in the pantry. I would use whatever we had because I'm not picky enough to have a preference. As long as I'm not cooking it in olive oil, I'll consider it a win.

There's an indie movie theater in Wilmington that makes their popcorn with coconut oil and it is SO GOOD. It has this barely-perceptible hint of beach that I really liked. I would try that, but I don't seem to be one of those people who buy jars and jars of coconut oil and use it for everything.
I tend to use mostly canola with a dollop of coconut oil. Even the refined stuff that doesn't taste coconutty gives the popped corn a nicer.... niceness.
I'm gonna try that. Nom!
I avoid peanuts, peanut butter, peanut oil, etc., when I can because I developed a weird sensitivity to peanuts after Elliot was born. (I'd eat a PB&J sandwich and get an itch along my ribcage an hour later. A friend said, "Oh, that's what my kiddo does when he has wheat, and it turns out he's got a wheat allergy." -lightbulb-) I think it's backed off, but allergies are weird and can go from zero to anaphylactic shock without warning, so I don't like to tempt fate. I miss peanuts, though!
Do you do other nuts/nut butters? Would almond butter satisfy the urge without causing a reaction? I don't blame you for avoiding it all out of caution.

Matt would be heartbroken to say goodbye to peanuts, but I don't think I'd mind either way. I'm kinda meh.
I apologize, but I just _cannot_ read that first sentence without snickering. I'm 12.
Hhuhhhhuhhhuhuh....
I'm kind of "meh" about other nut butters, and they tend to be spendy, anyway. I do usually keep almonds on hand, though, for nibbles, and they don't seem to cause a problem. (Peanuts aren't actually nuts, botanically, so a peanut issue shouldn't sort of automatically mean there's a tree nut issue as well.)
OM NOM NOM!!!! it's kinda like a rice krispy treat, but with popcorn instead of puffed rice! i would go for that so hard...
Dooood, it's really reeeeeeeally good.
I can't stop watching this.

Oh! and I'm totally with you about the popcorn snobbery! This is what I pop corn in:
https://www.worthpoint.com/worthopedia/vintage-50s-dominion-popcorn-popper-mint-in?platform=hootsuite
Oh my lordy! Look how amazing that is! Look at the box! I wanna display that box! I bet that makes deeeeeelicious popcorn. I am drooling!
Can we name it Popshmallow Pop?
Marsh Corn.
Can we also talk about popcorn and Junior Mints? Because if that's not a thing for you, maybe it should be. Ticks many of the same boxes as popcorn fluff pops, but ADDS chocolate AND peppermint. See? See?
I NEED THIS IN MY MOUF!
You are so cute. My favorite part is the sounds when eating off the spoon. Perfection. Props to the cameraman, as well!
Thanky! I haven't been this excited in a while. :)
Jebus, I adore you. This is not news, merely a reminder.
Nnndaaaaaw. :)
The best part: you don't have to get greasy hands from touching the popcorn!
Exactly! I hate greasy/sticky hands. This definitely addresses that. Plus sweet/salty! Crunchy/squishy! It's a treat of treats!
Pop Dip? I'm a kettle corn aficionado, so I get the sweet/salty appeal. Now can we talk about the Cracker Jack/Fiddle Faddle/Crunch n' Munch desperate lack of peanut equity?
I love Cracker Jack and will always prefer that not-too-thick-with-sugar style. I also love the molasses-tastic peanuts at the bottom of the box/bag.

Crunch and Munch, and to a slightly lesser extent Fiddle Faddle, while both tasty, are a bit too crunchy and sugary for my sad teefs.

I like that Cracker Jack still tastes like popcorn. Mmmmmm...
I love watching you get excited about the little things.
xoxo
Yes. This. A lot.
Dude. If you ate this, you would see it's actually a huuuuuge thing! Small thing, huge flavah. It's so damn good. OH GOD I'm gonna go make some right now.
Sounds like you just came up with the marketing slogan.
So, I was wondering what, exactly, is IN Fluff. In the process of finding out I stumbled upon this, because Internet.

"Marshmallow creme is also a traditional confection in Arabic cuisine, where it is commonly referred to as soapwort meringue (natef).[8] The original recipe is based on soapwort (roots of Saponaria officinalis)[9] or roots of the marshmallow plant, but modern commercial varieties are nearly identical to marshmallow creme. It was mentioned in a tenth-century Arabic cookbook, Kitab al-Ṭabīḫ (the book of dishes) by Ibn Sayyar al-Warraq."

Your snack has LEGS. Think about it! The melding of ancient Arabic and Indigenous Peoples of the Americas culture!
Agreed. Of course, now I'm also picturing a marshmallow tree (I know it's a plant, but go with me on this) which is exactly as you're picturing it. Like we could pluck marshmallows as if it was an apple tree.
Marshmallow treat, marshmallow tree. So close.
OK, that's pretty great!
I love this! I sat for a very long time trying to think up a new Siverstein-esque text to go with this awesome picture... and failed. "So the little boy took the marshmallows and sold them to the Keebler Elves so they could make Krispie treats. And the tree was sticky." Yeah no.
Awww! Yeah. There's a reason why Shel Silverstein was so awesome. :)
<<The melding of ancient Arabic and Indigenous Peoples of the Americas culture!>>

That's um, totally what I was thinking when I invented the snack! Yeah! Yeah!

(Nope. I just like cramming food in my face.)
I fucking love this video.
I made it hoping you would like it. :)
I love how many disparate and delightful conversations this has spawned. Well done, chica.
Totally planned that. Yep. Allllll myyyyyy doingggg. :)
 

...and some ibuprofen. 

Out of boredom with my piano lessons (which are mostly scales at this point), I (legally) downloaded the sheet music for an Easy Piano arrangement of Little Red Corvette, and spent the last hour teaching myself to play it. 

It's a good thing that His Purple Majesty has passed beyond the veil, because if he had seen how rudimentary this arrangement is, he would have sued for libel ("Nothing I wrote could ever be that simple!"), and if he heard my rendition of it, he'd have turned inside out and disappeared in a column of violet and golden flame. I spent an hour pounding my way through it, grateful that nobody can hear me, trying to stretch-jump from a high E to a regular E with one hand. My whole right arm hurts, which means my form is terrible and I'm doing it wrong. 

But, I can play the opening eight measures now. 

I'll keep you posted. 

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9/21 '18 6 Comments
Between this and the pickle updates... I don’t know which is my favorite!
Thank you. You keep me going. When I can actually play something listenable, I'll post a video.
Someday your Prince will come ...
...and pontificate about the Jehovah's Witness testimony. And I'll yell, "I REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE FUNKY!"
The “easy piano” sheet music for that is hilarious. I should have gone with that one first.
 

I'm sitting at work in a fit of mild anxiety. You see my new fence is being installed today. I'm not anxious (mostly) about the fence. But because the fence installation might take two days, my dogs are at a friend's house. So, the defense of the house, without my presence, has devolved to my cat, Spot.

Make no mistake. The  loyalties of cats never change. They are loyal to themselves, only.

Have you ever heard of a cat dragging their insensate owner from a burning building? Enough said.

I'm (mostly) certain that everything will be fine. And for those keeping track at home, this is remodel project #2, headed for the record books. Next up, we get the heat pump installed.

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9/20 '18 1 Comment
You and your dergs are gonna love your new fence! I'm so thrilled that your home improvement wishes are coming to fruition!
 

The remaining six batches continue to smell okay on their half-week check-up. I have reasonable confidence they won't go bad.

We ran out of store-bought pickles. I picked a tub and filled up the jar, keeping the brine that was in it. We can at least have some kinda pickle experience while the rest mature. They're not really really done yet. 

Tasted one. Kinda... garlicky... [ coughs ] .. yeah... going to be a good pickle when it grows up. I wonder if there's enough dill, though. Maybe I should get some dill seed and toss it in, just to be sure. Couldn't hurt, right?

Edited to add

Good news: I did buy some more dill and added it to all of the batches. It just felt like the right thing to do.

Bad news: I think one of them is going bad. It doesn't smell quite right when I opened it all the way up, and there's a bit of an oil-slick appearance to the surface of the liquid. I'll look at it again on Saturday to verify but we are probably down to five. Fortunately, the hot pepper amended batch is still fine.

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9/19 '18 4 Comments
I too am pro pickle.
Please mail me a pickle when done. Kthxbai.
I am also a fan of the pickle updates. Come on little greenies, you can make it!
I love pickle updates.
 

OPW appears to be the culprit in draining my iPhone battery when I keep a tab open 24/7.

Maybe it's also the culprit on my laptop battery, which is having trouble keeping a charge for more than a few hours' use.

(If I thought the problem was just the batteries' age, I wouldn't be writing this post.)

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9/19 '18 2 Comments
Hi,

I took a peek. OPW does very little when it's just sitting there on the page, it's not running one of these newfangled frameworks... it does update the counters, but that happens only once per minute, and it's what you were hoping for, presumably, when you left the tab open. Hmm.

Aha: the "infinite scroll" mechanism that loads more stuff as you scroll down was relying on an interval that fires 10 times a second. While it doesn't actually go get a new page every tenth of a second - that would certainly shred batteries - it does do a little math every tenth of a second.

So I switched it, just now, to actually look for scroll events rather than firing on a timer, and this may help. Hit refresh and let me know, if you would.
Will put it to the test over the next couple of days. Thanks.