This evening's nightly leap into the World Wide Rabbit Hole transported me onto the official site for actress/singer E. G. Daily. And just like that, my first serious adolescent celebrity crush came a-rollin' back. 

I'm pretty sure Valley Girl is the movie that got that ball rolling. Here's a nice collection of snippets from the movie - but really, if you haven't seen it, you should check it out. It's smart, funny, raunchy, and about six times better than it probably should have been. E. G., also known as Elizabeth, is the one with the biggest hair - no small feat for a teen cast in '83.

I mean - come ON. That's just not fair. I was doomed. Before I saw her, I was unaware that I had a "type" - I just liked pretty things. (I realize this post is making me dreadfully shallow. Sorry. I was 12.) But suddenly I knew exactly how I liked 'em: short. Curvy. Un-thin. Big eyes. Irrepressible smile. Slight husk in the voice.  Cute, rather than "pretty." In the pantheon of purely superficial methods for judging the physical aspects of our fellow humans, turns out these are a few of my favorite things. And Ms. Daily had 'em all. 

It didn't hurt, of course, that Valley Girl was rated R, and E. G. bared a good deal of her naughty bits on the screen. But so deep was my crush that I nearly turned away at those parts - it just seemed disrespectful to see my future prom date in such a state. (Nearly.) Besides, she was as wholesome as Donny Osmond baked in a vanilla pie in Pee-wee's Big Adventure, and she was totally my girlfriend in that movie, too. You remember her in that, right? She was Dottie, who had a serious unrequited crush on our titular hero, and what the actual shit, Pee-wee? How are you not saying "screw it, I'll get another bike," whisking her up in your arms (she's very pickupable, which is another plus), taking her to the park and smooching her on the jungle gym before sneaking into the skating rink without paying because Ms. Daily is all about having fun? How are you not holding hands with her during Ladyhawke as you try to position your knuckles on her mini-skirted leg, because it's just "more comfortable that way?" How are you not asking her to slow-dance to Bob Seger's "We Got Tonight" even though you know you'll be spending the next four minutes desperately trying to hide your erection? 

Since then, E. G.'s had her share of "work" done, which is her prerogative, of course, but still a minor disappointment. But I'm delighted to learn that even though the last movie I saw her in was The Devil's Rejects (2005), she's as active as ever, appearing in a bunch of movies and shows and doing a slew of voice-over work, arguably her bread n' butter. She's even got a nice singing career going; her slightly weather-beaten voice is a fine instrument for the pleasant country-pop she favors. And she still has that way of looking right into the lens as if to say "Matt, I've got all these tiresome boys after me and all these actressy things I gotta do, but what do you say we find some bleachers and see if we can get to second base, which is perfect because I'm honestly not quite sure what you're supposed to do on the following bases."

That's what that look is saying to you guys too, right? Um...right?

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This has been the first installment of Matt's Childhood Crushes. Tune in next time as we discuss Diane Franklin, with a special focus on what happened when Matt discovered an odd but vital film entitled Second Time Lucky. Ta.