Staying Afloat
6/11 '23
So you're at the public pool. You finally managed to learn to keep your head above water all by yourself.
Then, you get splashed a lot and when you look around, you realize that you're in a pool where olympic athletes come to do their laps. You're surrounded by them.
Then someone comes along and says "Guess what folks, we figured out individual motor boats. No need to know how to swim anymore!"
Makes it kinda hard to keep your head above the water.
* * * * *
In case it's not abundantly clear - I'm kinda burning out. I'm still plugging along, but my heart's not really in it. There's a tremendous sense of "What's the point?"
Anyway - the image(s) up top are what I did today on my day off (rain).
Tried a new technique. Someone pointed out in one of the videos I watched that there's no real reason to stick to the old process of a. pencils, b. inks, c. color flats, and d. rendering because that was designed for the comics of old based on physical limitations created by the printing process. So if you're working digitally...
So I went straight from 'pencils' to 'painting'. Dunno. There's some good texture in there, but I think I should have spent more time on the figure's silhouette. The arms get a bit confusing.
The pose was based a little on the third one below - all of which I did yesterday just to be 'putting pen to paper'.
I know, there’s a limited amount of stuff you can carry around with you. I get a lot of enjoyment out of the tactile part of art and crafts: writing in a notebook with a good pen, doodling with a pencil on paper, knitting with different kinds of yarn. Maybe this would help you find some enjoyment in it again.
I just made myself a little 'traditional media art kit' that I keep in the car. it's another man-purse (I'm a bag whore) with the following things in it (if my memory covers everything):
* moleskine sketchbook
* small pack of watercolors (2 different packs) with brushes
* pencils
* ink pens (fineline)
* kneeded eraser
* a couple of card games
* a watercolor postcards pad (paint your postcard, then tear it out, apply postage and send)
I too get a lot out of traditional media work. It _feels good_ to do.
Two problems I have:
1. I KEEP trying to tape the page with two fingers and 'undo' the last stroke I made. I can't tell you how many times I do this. I really am a trained monkey.
2. It feels SO inefficient now. It's silly, but this actually bothers me down deep. There's a part of my brain that's constantly whispering: "We could do that faster. That wouldn't be an issue if... You know, that would take as long if..."
That's not to say it's without value. I really will try to do more, but it's a convenience thing on top of everything else.
If I stop to grab a bite, which of the two bags will I grab? The one with traditional media? (Cumbersome, no art in it to show folks who ask, can only do one thing) Or the iPad bag (with ALL my art in it, games to play while I'm eating, etc...)
I know that can sometimes take the joy out of a thing...or is it the A.I. situation alone?
And more.
Doug Adams said the answer to life, the universe, & everything is 42.
That's likely true. But I think all the answers can more easily be found in The Princess Bride (though towels are helpful in most any situation…).
When one has a solid direction & is aware of the terrors, one can move with effortless ease through the fireswamp. Without the awareness & direction, one spends the majority of their time fighting off R.O.U.S., half drowning in the lightning sand, whilst repeatedly falling victim to fire spurts.
Is that the definition of living there quite comfortably for some time?
Noooooooooo.
That’s just surviving out of sheer will, determination, & an intense distaste for Humperdink.
But that doesn’t allow time for thinking things through clearly, or thoroughly. Or the brainpower to ask pertinent questions like…
"What are our assets?" and "What are our liabilities?"
Take some time. Do some stuff you enjoy. Do your art for the sheer love/fun of it.
Fuck Humperdink (don’t literally fuck Humperdink…he looks like a super selfish lay…just let go of the pressure).
That’ll give ya the opportunity to assess what the assets and liabilities are.
Which generally brings clarity and direction.
So creativity can burn brightly.
Like a holocaust cloak.
And then all ya gotta do is lay around in bed admiring perfect breasts & making a few brilliant verbal stabs at that stupid Humperdink.
And Voila! Ya got the Princess.
The slow, tiring process of writing it made me think my way through what I wanted to say and use as few words as possible.
My point is, the slow process will make you learn what AI never will.
I overthink my visual art because I worry about wasting art supplies but then I don’t improve because I don’t practice. Unused art supplies are a bigger waste.
https://venturebeat.com/ai/the-ai-feedback-loop-researchers-warn-of-model-collapse-as-ai-trains-on-ai-generated-content/