Nadja is a 1994 vampire movie starring Peter Fonda as Van Helsing.  So far, so good.  The film was written and directed by Michael Almereyda, but its $1M budget was financed entirely by David Lynch.  The whole thing is in black-and-white, but the "vampire-vision" point-of-view was obtained by using a literal Fisher-Price toy Pixelvision camera.  Here's my favorite quote sequence from the movie:

Nadja (holding Lucy's pet tarantula Bela):  "What does he eat?"

Lucy:  "Potatoes. Potato salad. Beer[?*]. I tried to teach him French but he wasn't interested."

Nadja:  "Maybe he has a learning disability."

[?*] That word is unclear.  Maybe it's actually "Deer"?  That makes even less sense, though.  Was this part actually scripted?  The actress playing Lucy is Galaxy Craze, and she reportedly said "I don't recommend people give their kids weird names."

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We just saw an appallingly bad movie and I'm entertaining the possibility that you may have found a worse one. But it's unlikely.