Eighty-nine
1/29 '22
Cold as balls at 16° in Macungie. We got 4" of snow today.
This morning, had a lucid dream. And a "Groundhog's Day"-type dreamception, which is how I was able to have the lucid one.
I was in my house, starting to wake up, when I thought I heard the neighbors shoveling. So I got up, got my stuff on, and opened the front door, only to find a bunch of groceries on my porch, which was probably from my neighbor who does that sometimes. But there was also some strange guy, in his 30s, standing there, who wanted to come into my house, like to sell me something. So, I had to talk him back outside of the house, which I did.
That's when I realized I was still in bed sleeping. So, I got up, got my clothes on, opened the front door and started trying to shovel, only to realize that I was still dreaming. And then I thought, well, if I'm still dreaming, I can just do whatever the fuck I want. I can't remember what I did in detail, but I did something really crazy like fly around inside an acid trip (never had one) like that scene in Big Lebowski. I could feel my stomach drop from flying straight up into the air and everything. I was having a blast It was only for a few seconds, but it was definitely lucid dreaming. My third time ever.
Then, I finally *actually* woke up and thought, this is real. Except I didn't get up and get my clothes on yet and go out, cuz it's fucking 16°. I'm dragging my feet a little right now.
Oh, and the neighbors aren't home, they never were. I knew that when I went to bed last night.
I know, in the waking world, that dreams like that are often my unconscious mind trying to say “hey - wake up! You need to pee!” and that, if ignored, will end up tricking me into peeing the bed by leading dream-me to think I found a suitable place to finally go.
This time, dream-me was like “hey! This is one of those pee dreams! You should wake up, climb down the ladder, and go outside to pee.”
So I did.
But just as I was outside and about to start going, I thought “wait a second…I think I might still be asleep and this is just a much craftier pee dream than usual.”
So I woke myself up again, thought “whew…that was close…” and headed down the ladder and outside to pee - for real this time.
Except it wasn’t real! I was still dreaming! And again I caught on and realized it at the last possible second.
Finally I actually woke myself up for real and completed the (e)mission - but every once in a while to this day, I occasionally find myself wondering if everything that happened for the past few years has all been a dream and I am actually, right now, lying asleep in the rain forest in a pool of my own urine. It would certainly explain a few things.
Because both are certainly "you people" types. (For the record, I used to shovel if and when I damn well felt like it, but then I guess I got curmudgeonly and adultish as I got older. Boooo.)